Charlie Quotes (archive)

Sep 30, 2005
Watching the Dora spin-off “Diego!” or whatever it’s called: “Uh, excuse me? The animals are talking?!”
Aug 9, 2005
“Mommy, I’m really pleased with our new TV. [Looks around] Is there anything else new in this house?”
Jul 27, 2005
Charlie: “Mommy, it’s 8 o’clock.”
Me: “How do YOU know?”
Charlie: “Because I went in the bedroom and I looked at the clock.”
Me: “Did Grace tell you what time it was?”
Charlie: “Actually, yes. I didn’t know what numbers were on the clock.”
Jul 21, 2005
Charlie, while watching Jimmy Neutron: “I wish we could see Ultra Lord naked.”
Jul 15, 2003
Charlie just said to me, "Mommy, I don't want to go. Because I am too poopy. I will poop on the floor!"
Jul 13, 2003
Charlie and Grace were playing with his Tickle Me Elmo. Elmo was laughing, and Charlie, with a dismissive wave of his hand, said, "Oh, shut up, Elmo!" which Grace followed up with, "Elmo, you're a jerk!"
Jul 8, 2003
The Garbage Monster was here! IT WAS VERY EXCITING!!!
Jul 7, 2003
Charlie has been sneezing nonstop for 15 minutes. I didn't know it was possible for one tiny little body to hold that much snot, but apparently it is.
Jul 6, 2003
Charlie, upon seeing Grace for the first time this morning: "Hey Grace, look- you're awake!"
Jun 30, 2003
Charlie came up to me today and started poking at a freckle on my upper arm. He said, "It's so beautiful and shiny!" and kissed my elbow. Then he asked, "Can I try it on?" I had no idea what he had in mind, so I said yes, and he picked up my arm, draped it over his head, and asked, "How does it look?"
Jun 27, 2003
Charlie has chosen to watch the "Pillow Monster." That's Trumpy, to me and you.
Jun 19, 2003
I guess they're playing Pokemon. They've been running around yelling, "Picachu (sp?), I choose you!" "Squirtal, I choose you!" I can't help but think, "Mommy chooses vodka."
I don't know what game the kids are playing, but I just heard Charlie yell something about "...a dolphin... of EVIL!"
Jun 17, 2003
Charlie, while I was changing his diaper: "I'm a superhero! I am a naked superhero!"
"You're so fresh, Mommy. You're so fresh and yummy."
A "conversation" between Charlie and his He-Man figure:Charlie: "Why do you have seatbelts on you arms? Do they keep you safe?"He-Man: "Um, I don't know. They help my superpowers."
Grace: "Pica! Pica! Pica Pica!"Charlie: "Squirtal! Squirtal! Squirtal? Squirtal!"
Jun 16, 2003
Charlie found the remains of Baby Doggie (a plastic toy that got stepped on): "Mommy, Mommy! Baby Doggie... his face is gone!"
He wasn't horrified, although I expected him to be. The only thing he's said besides that is that it's "bwoke."
Charlie asked me to draw a shark for him (I did a pretty good job, I think...), and then he colored it in all by himself. Almost completely within the lines! Grace didn't get that until she was almost 5. I think maybe he's been watching her more than we thought.
Jun 10, 2003
"It's raining, it's pouring, the old man is boring. You go back to sleep and you bumped his head. It's raining, it's raining, it's pouring, oh man, it's boring. Oh man, it's pouring. You go to sleep and bump his head."
Jun 9, 2003
The kids are playing "Sick Charlie". Charlie is "throwing up" and "sneezing," and Grace is "taking care of" him.
Jun 6, 2003
Charlie, holding up his right hand with his left: "I've got a hand machine."Me: "You've got a hand machine? What does it do?"Charlie: "It puts cereal in my mouth."
Jun 5, 2003
Completely out of the blue: "Mommy, I don't want to change my dipey and put my willy in the toilet."
Jun 4, 2003
As I was leaving the kitchen with my breakfast this morning, Charlie started asking me questions.Charlie: "What you got in you cup?"Me: "Chocolate soy milk."Charlie: "What you got in you bowl?"Me: "Cereal."Charlie, now running after me: "LET ME SEE! LET ME SEE! [Looking in thebowl] Very nice!"
Jun 2, 2003
In his sleep this morning, Charlie said, "Mommy! [Unintelligible] ...ants live in spiders, EWWWWWWW!"
I just heard Charlie sing/say, "Charlie stay or Charlie go. Hey, howyou live?"
May 28, 2003
We were reprimanding Grace for something she did at the dinner table, and she said, "But Charlie did it." Ken replied, "But he's three!" to which Charlie said, "Yeah! That's me!"
May 27, 2003
"Mommy! Cat puke, over the-re!"
May 23, 2003
Charlie just walked up to me and said, "Mommy, you want to see my belly and my tushie?"
May 22, 2003
Charlie just asked me to put a Teletubbies tape on for him, and then he told Grace, "Crummy-tummies are cute!"
May 20, 2003
Charlie's got his six peanut butter crackers laid out in a line in front of him, and he picks up one, takes a nibble, puts it down, and moves on to the next one. He goes across the row and then starts at the beginning again.
May 12, 2003
I KNEW he was being too quiet! He's been sitting on the floor behind me, making a shuffling noise, but I didn't really think anything of it. I just looked to see what he was doing, and he had half that new package of diapers pulled out and scattered everywhere! I gasped and said, "Charlie!" and he immediately crouched down, hid his head, and started to cry. I never yelled at him, but he got hysterical!
After I cleaned up the diapers, I picked him up and he started sobbing, "I sorry Mommy! I really sorry, Mommy!"
May 8, 2003
Charlie, standing on the sofa so he's taller than me: "I'm a big boy. And I have money, too!"
May 5, 2003
Charlie smells like Old Spice. Maybe it's the nicky bars he's been eating; I don't know.
Charlie was standing at the table, singing, "Cauliflower, cha-cha-cha! Cauliflower, cha-cha-cha!" like Face does, and he was even doing a little dance. It was really funny.
May 1, 2003
Charlie and I went for a short walk at 10, and then sat on the steps for 10 minutes. He totally loves being outside.
He was afraid of the ants though, until I told him to say to them, "Go away ants; leave me alone!" He was okay after that.
He spent most of his time sitting next to me and "tickling" my arm.
Apr 30, 2003
Everything Charlie knows about dancing, he learned from Dee Dee.
Apr 25, 2003
We're watching Snoopy Come Home, and when they showed Lila just now, Charlie said, "A GIRL, Mommy! Look, she so pretty!"
Apr 24, 2003
Grace and Charlie are playing "Fire Guys..."
You know how I always ask him if he's my little bear, or my baby? He's started asking me if I'm his dolly, and when I say yes he hugs my arm.
Charlie's playing with his little red friction car, and every time he's ready to let he go, he yells, "Are you ready? Set... go! I rock! I am!"
"Hey... Hey, Mommy? Poop is gwoss, ew!"
Apr 23, 2003
Charlie just asked me for another breakfast, since he didn't like the two already made for him. I told him no more breakfasts, so he said, "Mommy, you drive me nuts! [Stomping away] I out of here, Mommy!"
Well, now he's frantically whispering to himself and occasionally growling.
Apr 22, 2003
Charlie was just bent over a dark fuzzy on the carpet, saying, "Hey little fella, whatchu doing here?"
Apr 18, 2003
The kids are watching SpongeBob, and someone found a bunch of goldcoins. So Charlie says, "Coinses. Mommy!" And I said, trying to subtly correct him, "Coins?"And Charlie replied, "No, coinses, I said!"
Apr 17, 2003
I asked Charlie for a kiss, and he actually gave me one, so I asked for another. He kissed me again, so I asked for several more. After about 5 or 6 kisses, he wagged his finger at me and said, "No more kisses, Mommy."
Apr 15, 2003
Charlie just came over and did the "Boo who?" knock-knock joke with me. When I said, "Boo who?" he twisted one foot beneath him, got all big eyed and sincere, and said, "I'm sorry I made you cry."
Apr 14, 2003
Charlie showed me the "magical monster" (Trumpy) again, and he said, "Hmm... he's shaped like a pillow!"
Apr 9, 2003
I gave him one of those penlights we bought for WDW to keep him busy, and he's standing here at the desk with the top drawer open, shining the light into the "dark" and occasionally saying, "Hmm..."

"Hiccup and HICCUP... That's a good one, Mommy!"
Apr 3, 2003
Charlie, while watching PB&J Otter: "Those guys are singing! They rock and roll, alright!"
Apr 2, 2003
Charlie, right before Gomez Addams-ing my arm: "Hey Mommy, me gonna kiss you so much!"
Apr 1, 2003
There's a boy on The Wiggles who is wearing a shirt that's similar to one of Charlie's, so he's insisting he's on TV with The Wiggles, and that Grace is on there, too.
Imagine in the most pathetic voice imaginable, "Mommy... Cheese crackers can make me happy..."
Charlie just woke up, and the first thing he said when he came out to the living room was, "Babies are gonna come to my house! Yes, they gonna play with my toys."
Mar 31, 2003
You know that singing Boots doll commercial, where he says something like, "That Boots is MEEEEE!"? Well, Charlie keeps singing it over and over again, and it's really cute. And he knows it.
Charlie, talking about his Play Doh: "Where's my gooey cake? Maybe Daddy took it."
Me: "I hope he didn't eat it."Charlie: "No, it's too yucky. And he took my spoon."
Mar 27, 2003
Charlie just came running up to me, waving his arms in the air and yelling, "Doggie, spiders, cake! They gwoss! They yucky!"
Mar 25, 2003
[Sneeze... splat]
I don't know what just happened... I made Charlie a bagel, and a cup of chocolate milk in his lidded cup. He went to the table, and I stayed in the kitchen to make my bagel. When I walked out into the dining room, Charlie was sitting stunned on his chair, chocolate milk all over his face, dripping down onto his shirt, and chocolate milk drops on his plate and the table. I don't know what he did, and I'm not sure he does either...
He looked stunned, and he wasn't reacting to the dripping milk at all.
Mar 24, 2003
I asked Charlie if Grace is his sister, and he said, "No, she's my Grace!"
Charlie this morning, as I'm putting sunblock on Grace: "Look Grace, you naked! AH-hahahahahahahaha!!!"
Mar 20, 2003
Charlie, last night in his sleep, "1,2,3,7,8,9,4,3,2,1."
"Mommy? We go Disney World? Pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease???"
Mar 18, 2003
Charlie just walked up to me and said, "Hey baby, what's happening?"
Mar 17, 2003
Charlie's on the floor, playing with his Boots doll, and I overheard the follow dialogue:
"Say abre."
"No, I can't say abre anymore. Boots, no..."
I was pretending to cry because Charlie wouldn't give me a kiss, and he said, "No Mommy, don't be sad... Daddy be so mean to you, don't cry."
Mar 14, 2003
Charlie's trying to look in his own ear with that mini flashlight.
Dear God... Charlie's discovered Caillou.
Mar 7, 2003
Charlie, as a Joe Blue's Clues is starting: "Mommy, I don't want to watch Joe, I want to watch Steve!"
Grace is still at school. When I got there, Mrs. Byers said it was looking a lot better. Grace's eyeball is a little pink, but it's mostly her face that looks bad- it's really blotchy on her forehead and her cheek around her eye, and even on her other cheek. We decided that it's probably not pink eye; since her face is so blotchy she probably has an allergic reaction to something at art class. Grace wanted to stay, so I let her. I was there during sharing time, when they were all sitting on the floor, and Mrs. Byers was so nice to Charlie, she invited him to sit down with the class, and then when DeMonica was done with Headline News, she asked Charlie to share with the class. He stood next to her and she asked him his name (Cha-wie), his age (Cha-wie), if he's 2 (no, Cha-wie), if he's 3 (no, Cha-wie), if he's 4 (no silly, Cha-wie). He had a great time, but he was upset to leave, and wanted Grace to come with us.
Mar 6, 2003

I just poured myself some lemonade, and Charlie ran over for a sip. I didn't tell him what it was, and after his sip, he made a surprised face. "It's not water. It's not orange juice. It's not chocolate milk. It's... let me think... it's, it's, it's your lemonade!" [Takes another sip] "It's, it's, it's GOOD!"
"Mommy, me want to watch Pokepon!"
I [heart] Max and Ruby. Or, Wooby and Max, as Charlie calls them. I owe my shower to them. Soon as the show started, he plopped on the floor in front of the TV. A few minutes into the show, I told him I was going to go take a shower, and he turned and said, "Okay, Mommy," and then went back to his show. I came out 5 minutes later and he was still in the same position, eyes glued to the TV. He didn't move until it was over.
Mar 5, 2003
Charlie has healing powers!!!I started retching a few minutes ago, when I was in the kitchen- that loud "egggh!" sound... Anyway, the first time I did it, Charlie mimicked me. Then I did it again, and he mimicked me a second time. I started laughing, and didn't have to retch anymore.
[Kristi:] That's my boy. Charlie and I want pizza.
Feb 28, 2003
Charlie is trying to reach Dommie under the desk, and was complaining that he can't reach her. I told him that was good, that she doesn't want him to reach her, and I swear he said, "She wants me. She wants my body."
Charlie walked by a minute ago, pushing one of Grace's dolls in a stroller. As he was walking by, he said about the doll, "He's too cute to walk." Now he and Grace have taken their "kids" to the park, and he's putting on a "Daddy" voice and saying to her, "Honey, let's make a micnic (picnic)."
Feb 26, 2003
A commercial for those Ello dolls just came on, and Charlie said, "I want those. I want Grace's Darbies."
Feb 20, 2003
I pointed out to Charlie that Blue's Clues is on, thinking he'd be excited about it, and he said, "No, it's not Steve, Mommy- just Joe's on."
Feb 19, 2003
Charlie stuck the prongs of an outlet plug in his nose, and yelled, "I pig! I pig!"
Feb 14, 2003
My son was singing along to Master Ninja Theme Song in the car- sniff... I'm so proud!
Feb 12, 2003
Your rotten son did it again! He stuck his hands down his poopy diaper, and then asked me to wash his hands. I washed them, changed his diaper, and then I had to clean poop from under his nails. Is this a guy thing?
Feb 11, 2003
"I wanna go in the kitchen and make bacons."
Jan 28, 2003
Charlie, sticking his hand down the front of his diaper: "I'm putting my fingers in my tushie."Me: "Why do you want to put your fingers in your tushie?"Charlie: "Because... LEAVE ME ALONE!"
Feb 03, 2003
All day today, whenever Charlie wants to get my attention, he punches me in the arm and says, "Hey, man!"
Jan 28, 2003
Charlie just told me there's puppets in his tushie.
Jan 27, 2003
"Can I please say 'shut up' to Grace? Please? Please?"
Jan 13, 2003
As Charlie was incoherently yelling at Grace just now, I couldn't help but notice how much he sounds like Stitch.
Jan 10, 2003
29 lbs, 14 oz, 36 inches. He was really bad at the doctor, didn't want anyone touching him, kept begging me to take him home.
Jan 08, 2003
Driving down the road, we saw a radio promotion, featuring an Elvis impersonator waving from the side of the road. I said, "Hey, it's Elvis!" and Charlie yelled, "Yay, it's El-valent! An elephant! It's a huge elephant!"
Every minute or so, I hear- Bang! "Ouch! I'm okay Mommy, I'm okay."
Jan 07, 2003
Charlie asked me for chocolate milk, so I poured some in his cup and handed it to him. As he was walking away, I said, "What do you say?" and he replied, "Chocolate milk!"
Jan 06, 2003
Charlie: "Want crackers breakfast!" (bowl of wheat crackers)
Kristi: "Okay, here."
Charlie: "Mmm... crackers breakfast..."
Kristi: "What do you say?"
Charlie: "Crackers breakfast!"
Jan 03, 2003
Charlie: "Mommy! Mommy! There's a gorilla in my room!"
Kristi: "It's okay, I'll protect you."
Charlie: "I want Daddy!"
Jan 02, 2003
He's such a good sport! Grace has him dressed in his red sleep shirt, his puppy costume sweatpants from Halloween (with tail), that black knit hat, a scarf, and his Handy Dandy Notebook slung over his arm. Oh, and the Mr. Potato Head suitcase is his lunchbox.
Dec 30, 2002
Charlie's watching Snoopy Come Home, and at the part where the little girl "finds" Snoopy and names him Rex, Charlie just yelled, "That not Rex, that's Noopy!"
Dec 13, 2002
Charlie turns away from me to whisper, "Okay, let's say 'Happy Birthday,' Mommy!" and then he turns towards me and yells, "Happy Birthday, Mommy!" over and over and over and over again.
Now he's making me sing Happy Birthday to him while he opens his mouth and covers it with his hands in surprise and delight.
Dec 11, 2002
I just asked Charlie if he wanted to move Grace's rocking chair in front of the TV so he could see better, and he said, "Ehhh... urrrrr... no, thanks" and waved his hand at me.
Dec 10, 2002
First thing Charlie said to me after he woke from his nap was, "The boogie's on my chin, Mommy. The boogie's on my chin!"
After I changed his diaper, he said, "Thank you Mommy, thank you. Now be quiet, Mommy."
Dec 9, 2002
Charlie's ready to go... he's got on his Ho Ho hat, his scarf, and his "Christmas shoes" (Grace's dress-up shoes).
Dec 6, 2002
I don't know WHAT'S going on, but Charlie just said, "Go for it, Phoebe... go for it!"
Dec 2, 2002

Me: "Charlie, are you a baby?"
Charlie: "I not baby, I guy."
Also, he keeps insisting there's a monster in his closet. He got that from Stanley...
Nov 14, 2002
Charlie's going Stitch on the "baby bears" and the barn from Grace's dollhouse. He stomped towards the barn growling, knocked it over, then stomped on the bears.
Nov 8, 2002
Charlie refused to give me a kiss, but when he saw that I was "sad," he flashed me his belly.
Oct 31, 2002
He's still got his costume on, and he's wandering around with his and Grace's pumpkin baskets. Every so often, he wanders into our room to look at himself in the mirror, and say "Trick or treat!"
Oct 24, 2002
Charlie's got a whole sofa-jumping routine down:
From left to right— hop, hop, hop; 360º jump-spin; arms in the air.
Oct 10, 2002
Charlie's watching a Blue's Clues tape, and the commercial for Peanuts videos was on. As the kids were saying, "We want Peanuts videos for Christmas, Valentines Day..." Charlie was naming all the holidays with them. Then, when the little girl said, "Please can I have a Peanuts video?" Charlie said, "No."
Sept 11, 2002
I gave the kids a couple cookies for snack, and Charlie just came up to me with a big chocolaty mouthful. I asked him, "Did you shove that whole cookie in your mouth?" and his eyes got wide and solemn and he nodded his head yes.
He just put his napkin in the sink...
Sept 9, 2002
Charlie has taken to calling cereal "cat breakfast", because Tony the Tiger is on the box.
"I'm a dinosaur and I'm gonna eat a doggie."
Charlie's watching "Mouse and Catkey" (Tom and Jerry).
Sept 4, 2002
As we were passing The Hop, Charlie recognized it and started chanting, "Hey, ice cream! Ice cream! Ice cream!" Also, when we got home, as I was unlocking the door, he stomped on an ant and yelled, "Gotcha!"
Charlie, out of the blue... "I great Mommy! I great!"
Aug 29, 2002
Charlie's storing pretzels in his cheeks for winter.
Aug 28, 2002
I asked Charlie if he's my love muffin, and he said, "Nope, not buffin, I YEE-yee (Charlie)."
He's very upset and insisting that Abra tried to eat him.
Aug 23, 2002
We're watching the Teletubbies, and he got SO mad at Tinky Winky for playing with Po's scooter! He was yelling at the TV, and finally held Grace's lace shawl over the screen.
Charlie "fed" his "dinosaur" (wadded up piece of paper) a piece of bread- pretty much shoved a piece of bread into the wad of paper. Mmm...
Aug 22, 2002
I gave Charlie the last 2 Oreos. Then, when I tried to wipe his face, he ran away yelling, "Stop washing meeeeeeeeee!!!"
Aug 17, 2002
I helped Charlie with something, and then prompted him with, "Thank you, Mommy." He replied, "Thank you, Bunny."
Charlie LOVES his "chocolate meee-lk!"
Aug 15, 2002
Charlie (watching Toy Story 2): “Go Buzz! Go, go, go! Whoo-hoo!”
Aug 7, 2002
Charlie just pulled a Cookie Monster. I held out a graham cracker, and he immediately grabbed it and started crunching on it, crumbs flying everywhere!
Jul 31, 2002
(to The Wiggles song) “Quack, quack… der-de-doo”
He calls Bugs Bunny “the bug rabbit”.
Jul 17, 2002
“Ur bess mutter! (You’re the best mother!),” and then hugged my arm. Least, that’s what I THINK he said…
Jul 11, 2002
Charlie just counted from 7 to 13 in sequence by himself while Kristi listened in amazement!
Jun 27, 2002
“Woodybuzz… whoo-hoo!”
Jun 26, 2002
Charlie just tipped over in a chair. He’s not really hurt, but when I asked him if he was okay, he said, “Chair… nhn, nhn, nhn, HEAD…”
Jun 12, 2002
Charlie’s standing in the kitchen, chanting, “Breakfast time! Breakfast time!”
Jun 5, 2002
Charlie was just standing in front of the sofa, chanting, “Yay, peanut butter! Yay, babies! Yay, apple trees! Yay, apples!”
May 29, 2002
Grace has been giving Charlie horsey-back rides. Anyway, she just rode him across the room to his toys, and when he got off he said, “Thanks horse.”
May 24, 2002
Charlie: The bush lksdjf, “Ahhhhhhhhh!” sdflnsdflkasjf. TRY it!Me: Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!Charlie: [pointing at me] Ah… funny!Me: You!Charlie: [pointing at me] You! You! I LOVE vegetables!Me: I LOVE vegetables!Charlie: I lovvvvve YOU!Me: I love YOU!Charlie: [pointing at me] You! You! You!
May 23, 2002
Charlie’s lying on his back on the sofa, clapping, and alternately saying, “Yay, cookies! Yay, apple tree! Yay, cookies! Yay, apple tree!”
May 21, 2002
The kids are tossing toys in the air, saying, “Hip, hip, hooray!” Or in Charlie’s case, “Rid-der-ray!"
May 20, 2002
Your goofy son has been running in a small circle, waving Dolly’s headband and staring at the floor for about 5 minutes. Every so often he falls on his knees, then gets up and goes again. One time he stopped, stared at a crayon on the floor for a minute, then dropped to his knees and grabbed it. Still going…
May 17, 2002
Referring to Abra, our cat: “This kitty [looks like] a cow!”
May 15, 2002
When I picked Charlie up, I bumped his leg on the chair. He grabbed it and said, “Ow! That wasn’t nice!”
May 12, 2002
“Mmm… I luff betables!” (Mmm… I love vegetables!)
May 8, 2002
Charlie keeps pointing to me, saying, "Momma," and then back at himself saying, "Meee."
Apr 9, 2002
Charlie was just showing me a picture of some birds in one of his books, and I said, "Yes, birds!" and he corrected me and said, "Bird-cans (toucans)."
Apr 2, 2002
Apparently all the appliances are asleep on Rolie Polie Olie, so
Charlie's sitting in front of the TV yelling, "'k'up!" (Wake up!)
Mar 22, 2002
Grace: "Charlie tooted!"Charlie: "Grace poop!"
Mar 7, 2002
Is it wrong that when I wiped a goober out of Charlie's eye, and he wailed, "Eye! EYYYYYE!" I had a hard time trying not to laugh?
Feb 27, 2002
Charlie lunged after a ball and fell, then he did your "Unhhhhh" head shake, complete with his tongue hanging out.
Jan 30, 2002
Charlie is so funny! He was standing against the ottoman, watching Stanley, so I came over to do a diaper change. As soon as he saw me, he immediately dove for the floor in front of the TV, laid down on his stomach and started snoring, pretending to be asleep. Funny as hell!

Grace Quotes (archived)

Jul 13, 2003
Charlie and Grace were playing with his Tickle Me Elmo. Elmo was laughing, and Charlie, with a dismissive wave of his hand, said, "Oh,shut up, Elmo!" which Grace followed up with, "Elmo, you're a jerk!"
Jul 10, 2003
Grace just told me, "Tibbikins is under the chair. But watch out, he's tuffled!"
Jul 2, 2003
Grace and Charlie are pretending that they have a lot of pets to take to the vet, and I explained that it will cost them a lot of money. So Grace asked me, "Can my brother have a lot of money? [Whispers and winks] We're just pretending."
Jun 9, 2003
Grace was just singing that song from The Jungle Book: "The bare nuh-sesame!"
The kids are playing "Sick Charlie". Charlie is "throwing up" and "sneezing," and Grace is "taking care of" him.
Jun 5, 2003
A recent conversation between Grace and me while watching Blue's Clues:Grace: "Why does Joe never have to go to the bathroom?"Me: "He wears a diaper."Grace: "No, he doesn't."
May 28, 2003
We were reprimanding Grace for something she did at the dinner table, and she said, "But Charlie did it." Ken replied, "But he's three!" to which Charlie said, "Yeah! That's me!"
May 11, 2003
Grace just told me: Daddy, when I grow up, I want to go to outer space.
May 7, 2003
Grace, on Charlie: "It's like he's a crazy monster that sings along with music!"
Apr 24, 2003
Grace and Charlie are playing "Fire Guys..."
Apr 18, 2003
I did the little piggies rhyme with Charlie's toes, and so now he keepsdoing it to me. After he said, "This little piggy went to market" Graceasked, in a very serious voice, "Did he really go to the market?"
The kids are apparently running some sort of race, and Grace started itoff with, "On your mark... for golf. Get set... for golf. And go! Forgolf."
Apr 17, 2003
I walked into her room to see what they were doing, and Charlie waslying on the bed, under the covers and Grace was standing next to him.Grace told me that "Steve" was sick, and that he's allergic to dogs, soshe's feeding Blue outside. But while she was telling me "he allergicto..." she couldn't think of the word dogs, so I supplied the wordmonkeys. She said no, dogs, so I said, "Oh, so he could have a petmonkey" and I went into the kitchen.A few minutes later she comes in and says, "Excuse me, where is the monkey aisle?"
Apr 10, 2003
Grace is "reading" the Dora and Little Star book to Charlie, and when she was at the part where Little Star is falling to Earth, she said, "Let's catch her... or he, Boots!"
Mar 20, 2003
Grace, upon getting home from school and seeing there are no sheets onour bed: "You washed your sheets? Did someone pee in your sheets?!"
Mar 18, 2003
"Momma, when I grow up, I'm going to be a teacher at my school, when Mrs. Byers and Mrs. Bailey get old... and die."
Mar 7, 2003
While watching Master Pastry Chef Jacques Torres on his Food Networkshow, Grace said, "I think he's doing a good job with this cooking."
"Dear Daddy, I love you. I think you are the greatest, most favoritest Daddy in thewhole entire world. I love you, Daddy. First, we did our morning work, and then we sat down at group time andthen we, um, hmmm... went to art class today and it was a lot of fun.And then we went back and first I went back to class, and Mrs. Byerscalled Mommy and Mommy came and she saw me doing my sharing time, andfirst I had my snack before the other people had their snack. And I gota couple of tissues and, hmmm... we standed at group time and we went tocenters. And we had a lot of fun doing, um... um... hmm... um... um...um... centers and I, Grace, went to paintings and me and Caroline had alot of fun at centers and I and Zaquia got the favoritest puzzle that Ilike to do at school. And I put my... and after reading group, I, we,I, we went outside and played, but first before we had centers time, we,um... hmmm... we had snack time and I already had my snack, and my eyewas looking much better, it wasn't looking red anymore, and I and my eyefelt better a little bit, and then we went insided and we played atcenters and we did reading group. I was almost the last one to doreading group. And then I went back to paintings and I finished mypicture right before Caroline came back and finished her picture. And Iand Zaquia got out the most favoritest puzzle that I love. It was theboy and girl game that was a puzzle. And also we... and then we got outanother puzzle, and we played with it, but then I had to go to readinggroup. But when I was at paintings, I had to go at reading group, and Ihad the most favoritest day in the whole day. And that's the end.Um... um... hmm... I think I want... I love school today. I think Ilove you, Mrs. Byers, from Mrs. Byers's class. I think you are awonderful teacher, and Mrs. Bailey, I love you, too. And I think youare a too, wonderful teacher, too."
Feb 14, 2003
We have to move to Alabama (or maybe Kentucky).
Our kids have gotten married [to each other].
Feb 11, 2003
Grace was telling me that her teachers liked her new dress, and that Mrs. Byers looked at the label in it and said, "Yep, Lands' End!"
Jan 13, 2003
Your crazy daughter wants to name our future dog Kangaroo Kristi. I told her no, that the dog will come to us with its own name.
Dec 31, 2002
Grace and Charlie are playing with his toy school bus and the little people that came with it, and Grace just said, "I gave the driver some bird food, and now he's talking like a chicken!"
Dec 27, 2002
Grace, "reading" a book about birthdays:"Oh... that's the gift of love..."
The kids just came running out of the bedroom, Charlie chasing after Grace yelling at her, and Grace yelled back, "No Charlie, I'm not sleeping with you!"
Dec 23, 2002
"This puppy will eat a blue bone, which will make him die."
Nov 7, 2002
Grace: What's old and died?
Me: I don't know.
Grace: Pop-Pop.
Sept 26, 2002
Your daughter just asked me how you spell Nathan Schmidt. (Nathan is a boy in her class whom she calls her boyfriend.)
Sept 12, 2002
I pledge allegiance to the flagOf the A-nited States of AmericaAnd to the Republic For witches dance One nation Unforgot Indibisable With liverty and just for all
Sept 11, 2002
Grace, fluffing her hair: "Charlie, look... I'm a curly girl!"
Charlie: "Wow."
Aug 19, 2002
During storytime at Barnes and Noble, the woman reading to the kids pointed out that a character in the story had a really big mouth. Grace raised her hand and announced, "I have a really big mouth, too!"
Aug 7, 2002
Grace just informed me that she wants me to dress up as Bubbles for her 6th birthday party.
Aug 5, 2002
Grace was watching a 60-ish man painting picture on some show on PBS, and she suddenly said, “Mommy, I think I’m going to marry that man!”
Grace just told me that you guys are going to buy me Harry Potter cups, hats, etc for my birthday, but that she’s not supposed to tell me about it, because you and she are supposed to “zip [your] lips”. Good for keeping a secret, that one…
Jul 24, 2002
Grace (sitting and bouncing on a ball): I can blow super wind!
Jul 23, 2002
Grace (wearing a black shawl around her shoulders): Do you know who I am?
Me: Mojo Jojo?
Grace (giving me a dirty look and bowing her head so I can see the top): You see [sic] I have a big brain or something?
I still don’t know who she was supposed to be…
Jul 12, 2002
Grace was telling me that Charlie didn’t finish his breakfast, so I explained to her that he’s not as good an eater as she is, and when she was his age she wasn’t a good eater, either. She said, “I remember, let me tell the story. When I was a baby, I didn’t eat very much of my cereal. Like this. But now I do. And also sometimes I don’t eat my… um, bread all the time when I was a little baby girl. I just ate turkey and the bread. I just ate turkey out of the bread, and then I ate the bread. But now I do eat turkey sandwiches with the bread on. And then when it was snack time… and then I… and then at snack time… Now what did I have for snack time every… well, when I was a baby? I did have cookies for breakfast sometimes. Well, I did have cookies for breakfast sometimes. Because I like cookies. Are those M&M cookies or just different cookies? Or just plain old ones? I forgot what I had for breakfast that day, when I was still a little baby. Charlie’s still a little baby. So does that mean he’ll have to stay a little baby forever?”
Jul 11, 2002
“Mommy, how do you spell submarine?”
“S-U-B-M-A-R-I-N-E”
“Yep, you’re right. I knew that.”
Jul 2, 2002
Grace just got up and is using the bathroom. Charlie has his dinosaurs fighting on my arm, so I called out to Grace, “There are dinosaurs fighting on my arm.”
To which she replied, “Okay. Thanks for the update.”
Grace has been fawning all over Phoebe this morning, and she just said, “Awww, poor Phoebe. She has no one to play with but me.”
I couldn’t help but agree, “Poor Phoebe!”
Jun 13, 2002
“I’m as fast as a garlic cheese monkey.”
Jun 12, 2002
I just started laughing thinking about Grace singing the ABC song with her kindergarten class, and being the only one to finish up with a big, “Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!” Hee.
Grace and Phoebe were made for each other. Grace is dressing Phoebe up, and Phoebe’s loving it (well, the attention, anyway). Oops… looks like the honeymoon’s over — Grace just whacked her on the head for not staying still.
Jun 11, 2002
Your daughter is rubbed her head against my leg and purring.
Jun 6, 2002
“Turn Winnie the Pooh off. I can’t concentrate on my markers with that stinky old show on. Thank youuuu…"
“I was walking at the park one day. And a Mary cut my feelin’…”
“Dear Daddy, I miss you while you’re at work, and I want to give you this— a picture of Rolls and his name on it, and his little name in it, it’s “Dear Rolls.” And I evenwant to tell you where my Powerpuff Girls bowl and my Powerpuff Girls plate and my Powerpuff Girls cup come in my Powerpuff Girls bag. And my picture of me when Iwas a baby. And I love Mommy’s soda. And I love your soda. And I even love the birthday cake from Charlie’s birthday in the picture. And the Rugrats, and I love myRugrats vitamins, and I love my ownest, ownest, ownest, ownest… POSTER! I love Charlie and my Rugrats poster and I even love… and I love that I got my markers andpaints I happy that I got my markers from Christmas, and I’m glad Mommy bought me some more paints with lots of other paints. And I even lovvve my costume box, Imean my costume basket, and I love my costumes… Dear Daddy, I love you. And that’s the rest of my… Mommy? Poem.”
May 28, 2002
We save most of our coins in a jar for Disney World, but Ken gave the kids a few pennies to race in the donations bin at the mallGrace: "Yay! I won! I won! Now, those go to Disney World, right?"Ken: "No, I think those pennies go to a school."Grace: "Daddy, there’s a little SCHOOL in there?!"
Kristi and Grace are hugging Charlie between them…Kristi: “Charlie sandwich!”Grace: “I’m the chocolate!”
May 25, 2002
Grace, talking about Stuart Little: “At the library, I’m going to get that mouse talking one that has clothes book.”
May 22, 2002
Grace is mad at Kristi because my name (Ken) doesn’t have enough letters in it!
May 21, 2002
“Mommy, you’re growing up to be just like me. Aren’t you? But you ARE a grownup. Excuse me.”
May 17, 2002
On Playhouse Disney, they did a thing where they ask “if you have 5 cookies and your dog eats one, how many will you have left?” and Grace answered 4!
May 9, 2002
“Just call me Princess for now on, Mommy."
Grace was looking for her Angelica doll’s hairbrush, which I told her might be in her toy teapot, where I saw Charlie put it last night. She brings me the teapot, lifts thelid, and says, “See? Double nothin’!”
Apr 23, 2002
"Mommy, how do I look? Do I have style?"
"Mucho gusto! I'm just speaking in Spanish. You know, when people don't talk normal. And sometimes they wear bonnets."
Apr 12, 2002
Grace, noticing a carpet stain: "What's this?"Me: "One of the cats puked yesterday."Grace: "The cats puked a line right here?"Me: "Yep."Grace: "Tuh, they are so guilty!"
Apr 5, 2002
Grace was playing with her rice table, and was cleaning up a few grains that had spilled on the table:Grace: "See Mommy? I cleaned it up ALL by myself!"Me: "Very good! Where did you learn that?"Grace: "I learned it from the experts."Me: "Who are the experts?"Grace: "You and Daddy. My parents. I learned it from you because you are the experts."
Apr 3, 2002
"Charlie? Charlie ... have you ever dreamed that you was a rocket ... ship?"[no reply] "Charlie?"
Mar 29, 2002
Grace (feeding "Dolly" some dinner): "Dolly doesn't eat meat."Ken: "Oh, really?"Grace: "Yeah. She's a vegalarian."
Mar 22, 2002
Ken: "Don't yell at pieces of paper!"Grace (getting mad that her papers won't stay on the dresser): "Well, THEY started it!"
Mar 11, 2002
"Mommy, what kind of bread is this? Poop bread?"[Choking] "Does it taste like poop?"[Thinking about it] "Kind of."
Mar 7, 2002
Grace, changing from one costume to another:
"I've decided to change my look."
Mar 6, 2002
This comment totally came out of nowhere..."Mommy, when people don't have lima beans, they just come back and get some if they don't have any. If you just don't have any, then just go to a store. Okay, Mommy? Understand now?"
Feb 27, 2002
I was pretending that Backpack from Dora was real, because I thought that was what Grace wanted, but then she corrected me and said he isn't real. Then she said, "Mommy, when are you ever going to get smart?"
On your mark, get set, SLEEEEEEEEEEEP!"
Feb 25, 2002
[Grace tells me to take her ballerina skirt off my head] "You're no fun!""Yes, I AM fun, Mommy— because I think of the GREATEST. GAMES. EVER."
"I put in Singin' in the Rain, did you see that, Mommy?""I sure did. I guess you like that movie, huh?""I do. Just call me 'Singin' in the Rain Girl', Mommy."
Feb 22, 2002
Grace [wistful]: "Mommy, I wish I was a cat."
Me: "Why?"
Grace: "Because cats don't have to do chores."
Me [laughing]: "What chores do YOU have to do?"
Grace: "Well, I AM a mother."
Feb 21, 2002
"When I was in your tummy and I woke up, I could see your heart, Mommy."
Feb 19, 2002
[After Charlie got a haircut from the night before] "Mommy, Charlie's hair looks bald like Daddy's. Hehehehehehehehe..."
"Mommy. Remember when I lost a hundred teeth? THAT was embarrassing. Right, Mommy?"
Jan 31, 2002
I told Grace that she can ask the dentist when she'll lose a tooth, and she said okay. A few minutes later she asks me, "If I'm too shy to ask the dentist when I'll lose a tooth, will you do it?" I said yes, and then asked her if she thinks she'll be shy, and she said no. When I said, "Yeah, you've never been shy, have you?" she said, "No... well, maybe a little one time."
Jan 30, 2002
Grace told me that "Girls do this [big simpering grin] when they see a boyfriend." She thought it was hysterical that you were my boyfriend before we were married, and she informed me that Charlie is her boyfriend. I asked her what she does with her boyfriend, and she said they go on dates. I asked what they do on dates, and she said that "... he picks some flowers for me for our wedding in a couple of days."
"[Singing] I always forget my pants... Uh-oh... I forgot my pants!Hahahahahaha... I forgot my pants! I forgot my pants! [Lifting dress and yelling] I FORGOT MY PANTS!"